Enough.

Heyo, I'm comin at ya just like I usually do: sitting on my couch on a Friday after cleaning my room, starting my laundry, and lighting my favorite candle (seriously buy this candle in the red...worth every dollar I promise).

Self esteem can be a hard thing to keep up with in college. It feels like a constant battle to keep up with everyone else -- academically, physically, spiritually, in friendships, relationships, with having cool hobbies and side talents, and so on. It can be really emotionally draining when you look around and see all of these beautiful humans who are intelligent beyond comparison, have really cool hobbies, and play 12 instruments and 5 sports. Like okay.

BUT

What is easy to forget is that those people have insecurities also. Everyone has talents and everyone has insecurities, but we tend to only see our flaws and others' awesomeness. What a dumb thing! We are all children of a loving God who has granted us each with gifts and to think that one is greater than another just because it is more visible, or to not share those gifts is ridiculous. Our gifts are meant to help and uplift others; aren't we all brothers and sisters anyway? It's all about love, people.

Juliana sent me the link to this blog last night, and I'm so glad she did because I love it! I came across this post and it had the following picture, which explains my thoughts more eloquently than I ever could:

(I believe this applies to both genders -- you are enough)

Anyway, it's pay day which means it's errand day! Peace.

Here Am I

Something I've been pondering a lot lately is how to decipher between the voice of the Spirit and the voice of my brain. It can be a tricky thing trying to figure out if a thought is inspiration from the Lord or if it is simply just that -- a thought.

In 1 Samuel 3, the Lord is calling upon a young Samuel to be the new prophet. He calls Samuel's name three times in the night, yet each time Samuel mistakes it for Eli. Finally, Eli suggest to Samuel that perhaps it is the Lord that is calling his name. When the Lord calls Samuel the fourth time, Samuel answers "Speak; for thy servant heareth" (1 Samuel 3:10). This ten verse story holds so many teachings in it but I think I will just focus on one or two.

1. Recognizing the Lord's voice:

This passage is so beautiful because it shows Samuel coming to know the Lord's voice. Samuel's experience was of course different than any of ours because he was a prophet and spoke directly with God. However, we need to learn to recognize the voice of the Spirit because that is how God often communicates with us. 

2. Being willing to serve:

Each time the Lord called out to Samuel, he responded "Here am I." Even though Samuel originally thought Eli was calling him, he was willing to serve because he was loyal and eager to do the right things. If our hearts are set upon doing good, we should be willing to do righteous things whether it comes directly from the Lord or not. 

I think what I've learned from this all is that if I have a good thought, I'm going to act on it because I know the Lord will not inspire me to do anything that is not good. If that thought is the Spirit, then I am being a faithful servant. If it is my own brain thinking, I have simply done a good deed and nothing is lost. I hope to become as faithful and as willing to live the Gospel as Samuel was. I hope that each and every time the Lord tries to communicate with me that I say "Here am I."

Count Your Many Blessings, Name Them One by One

This morning I woke up feeling especially thankful to be living this life.

I am thankful for

my really comfy bed - a heater - electricity - comfortable yet fashionable sweaters - music - food - my car - my humble apartment - this gentle winter - fuzzy socks - chapstick - perfume - my little cactus

On a more serious note, I am thankful for

a country in which I can vote and get a job and practice my faith and go to school and not worry too much about my safety and and and....

friends who give me great advice and remind me of who I am and allow me to embrace that weirdo.

a body that can climb four-story hills and several flights of stairs each day to get to class.

a university where I can expand my mind and my faith.

medicine that gets me through the many sicknesses I accumulate in the winter.

technology so that I can stay in touch with people (and so that my mom can text me about how she FaceTimed with one of my nephews and he asked her where "Missa" was).

a family that cares so deeply for one another. My parents are awesome and my siblings, despite the age differences, are my best friends (in-laws included ;) )

the Gospel of Jesus Christ. It is truly the center of my life. Loving others and serving them is the most important thing in this world because A) every human is important and B) that is how we show our love for God.

Happy Friday!

And it really is just that -- a happy Friday. The apartment is clean and smells like my favorite candle (Voluspa's Goji Tarocco Orange from Anthropologie), the dryer is on which means clean clothes, I nailed my physics test, and I got paid! Woohoo!

This morning I woke up to a sweet little text from my friend Juliana along with this picture: 

Little does she know (hey Ju!) that this is something I have been thinking about a lot lately. Happiness and success are choices that I can make for myself just by putting myself in the right frame of mind and the right surroundings. Which is whyyyy I have been focusing lately on: getting more sleep, making better food choices, exercising regularly, and studying hard. Because I'm a college student, my happiness depends a lot on how I am feeling health-wise and how I am doing in school. Lastly, I finally decided to move at the end of this semester! I'm one of those weird people that likes to change stuff up every once in a while and I'm looking forward to meeting new people and making new friends for the spring term (May-June)!

If you made a New Year's Resolution, are you keeping up with it? Or has it already faded? Or if you're not much of  NYR person (like me), that's okay!! Setting goals or making changes can happen any time of the year! Just remember that everything starts in your mind, and that if you want to be happy, you'll have to make a conscious decision to be so!

Happy Friday y'all! 

Brain Break

Hello. I come to you from the Reading Room of the Harold B. Lee Library. Here's a real life description of my current state: I sit at a table alone with a few spiral notebooks, pages of amateur sketches for a "creativity" project scattered, my hair is in a ponytail, and I am wearing the comfiest sweater I own and my glasses. Also there is an extra packet of Mucinex, a package of tissues, and some chapstick next to my computer. 

{It's okay to not be glamorous all the time}

It's not even finals week yet. Although I've already taken two finals, but ya know. It isn't REALLY finals week until next week. I have so much to do before I fly home in 8 days, 19 hours, and 5 minutes (wait who's counting???) that 8 days, 19 hours, and 5 minutes seems like an eternity. 

This is not why I opened up a new blog post. But funny enough, it relates. Last Wednesday in my New Testament class, a quote was shared that hit me hard enough that I'm still think about it today:

"Doubt and faith do not exist in the same person at the same time."

Just think about that! Doubt, fear, and anxiety do not come from the Lord. He wants us to be happy and to have calmed hearts! We either trust Him or we do not.  Faith is of God. Doubt is not. 

T h e y   c a n n o t   c o e x i s t .

I can make it through these next 8 days, 18 hours, and 55 minutes. And so can you. 

With faith in the Lord, we can do anything. 

Smart Phone Detox

One of my pet peeves is when I'm trying to talk to someone and their eyes are glued to their phone. Guess what? I CAUGHT MYSELF DOING JUST THAT a few times this semester and decided it was time for a change. It was time for a smart phone detox:

It was oddly satisfying to declutter my friends lists, never get a notification, and feel like I could leave my apartment without my phone. Shouldn't I always be able to feel like that? Don't get me wrong, I love that I can call my mom, FaceTime my sister, text my friends, share photos, etc., but in this day and age, we feel obligated to respond immediately because we know from first-hand experience that being on the waiting end is the most annoying thing.

On another note, we often get so caught up in "social" media that we actually become anti-social. I mean, how often do you check Instagram while waiting on class to start instead of just talking to the people around you? I know I do it! D-U-M-B. 

Sorry for that tangent, back to my main point. My phone doesn't need to travel from my bedroom to the living room with me. I don't need to check everyone's Snapchat story before going to bed, and I don't need to scroll through Twitter when I wake up. 

H e r e ' s  W h a t  I  D i d  I n s t e a d :

Early in the week, I started to get used to not checking my phone because I turned off all push notifications. This eventually led to me barely, if ever, checking social media (which made Saturday a breeze). By the time it got to today, I was excited to turn off my phone for a full 24 hours (sorry Mom if you tried to call me). I fall asleep a lot faster at night because I don't check my phone before bed time, I get out of bed quicker, have better morning scripture study habits, try to meet new people in class, get a boat load of efficient studying done, and I've even started a new hobby. You might get to hear about that in a few weeks if you're lucky. 

It's not practical for me to turn off my phone forever because sometimes I need to call my mom and sometimes I need to look things up in the middle of class. And let's face it, sometimes I really really want to see what's on Instagram at the end of the weekend. But I'm gonna keep up this less phone time habit because it's truly liberating!

P.S. I cheated once -- by posting this picture as my Snapchat story yesterday. But how could I not!? We got KOLACHES in UTAH!!!! A true miracle.

[Kolaches ft. Katie Wheldon. Our Texan hearts were happy.]

Summer 2014

Holy blog! Apparently I forgot about you all summer long! (please click on that link)
I'm a believer in efficiency, and I'm also a believer in making lists, so let the list of my summer begin!

April:
I SURVIVED ANOTHER ROUND OF FINALS (miraculous)
I drove for two days with three other twenty-somethings to get home for the summer
Spent time with my family (all of my siblings were in town!!)
Visited Abbi at Rice!

May:
Visited Alan at Sam Houston State University
Visited Katie at University of Texas
Went to MiCayla's mission farewell
Babysat 12 hours a day for a week
Went to the Magnolia High School spring band concert
Reunited with several high school friends over frozen desserts (the best food group)
Traveled to Fort Worth for the annual Stutz Family reunion on Memorial Day

June:
More hanging out with friends
Went to a Backstreet Boys concert...kind of...with Alan, Emily, and a puppy
Went bowling - lol
Became the homemaker when my mom had neck surgery
My sister and brother in-law came back in town
Ran a 5k -- my first!!!!
Went to Galveston for Katie's birthday
Went out for Katie & Abbi's birthdays

July:
Several trips to the lake
More hangouts
Learned how to play Liar's Dice aka my new favorite game (Thanks Katie)
Got crafty
Hopped off the plane at LAX with a dream and my cardigan (Santa Monica beach/pier, Hollywood, Warner Brothers Studio, DISNEYLAND,  Huntington Beach, sea kayaking in San Diego)

August:
GNO
Helped at my brother's Eagle Scout project
Watched my oldest brother's kids while he and my sister in-law went on a cruise
Threw a party
Traveled to St. Louis to visit my brother, sister in-law, and nephew (so fun!!)
Am currently in the long process of moving-back-to-college-prep
Later this month:

     Another lake trip

     One Direction

     One Republic (quick trip to ATX)

     Move back to Provo, Utah!

FOR PHOTOS, VISIT THIS LINK